So I got lazy with the log reports. I just shit way too often to be recording it all the time. I also ran out of paper on the pad I was jotting things down on. If I ever have a really good shit worthy enough to report, I'm sure I'll write about it anyways.
I do have a good belch recipe though-- Eating popcorn and drinking orange juice makes your burps smell and taste exactly like Fruit Loops. Just follow your nose!